I. Die
—–
I am the pain that pulls your chest tight
That keeps you up all night
That makes you lose all sight
I make you scream in your darkest dreams
I make your life a living hell
Like a parasite
(Die. Arise. Belie)
I’m lost in twilight
I’m losing perspective
A new directive, with a bad ending expected
(Die. Arise. Belie.)
Killing is not so easy as the innocent believe
I’m so far from innocent
You would lose sleep
With the thoughts in my
I’m losing
(?…)
With my thoughts in my head
Remember the sound of the pouring rain?
(The pouring rain)
The one that masked you of your pain?
The skies are clear now just like your disdain (disdain)
There’s no coming back now, no coming from this
There is a horror beneath this grin
A darkness inside that lurks within
If you want to see it peel back my skin
Lay me with the weak
Lay me with the weak
I had nightmares that played out
Before my eyes
Dreams became reality
Noise became silence
I’m constantly told to pick up the pace
Another loose end, another dead waste
But I smiled just to save face
To keep their happiness in place
I was always told I was meant for something better
But the taste you left in my mouth was rather bitter
I can’t talk about it because nothing helped
No one helped me when I dug holes for them
But now I have no one left to save me
——-
Ii. Arise
——-
(I always told myself I’d be fine
Everything was meant to work out alright
But now she’s gone and I keep losing sight
Someone help me)
Come in through the front door and I feel my head spin
Another night sitting alone with the cold wind
From head to toe, I’m caked in blood
I don’t know why I did it, I don’t know why I run
From the things that are keeping me from coming undone
It’s either you or me staring down a loaded gun
Until the end of time, but I don’t want to give in
I can feel I’m slipping already now
Because I never win
I try to put pen to paper to unload my mind
But every time I try I have a hard time
Every time I speak now I lose my mind
It’s hard with this shit cramped in the corner of my mind
Telling me everything I’m doing is wrong
Like you’re the fucking reason that you lost your girlfriend all along
It wasn’t your enemies, or the 13, it was your fault
That you let her get out of sight
“That’s not right,” I scream to the blank walls that have seen everything
If they could talk they wouldn’t talk, they would fucking scream
(They would fucking scream)
Of the reasons that my knuckles bleed blood red in the moonlight
Even the devil is afraid of me
Fast tracked to hell, with a front row seat
What have I done? I ripped the heart from her killer’s chest
For what? Revenge? What was the point in that?
I want to scream at the skies but all I have is the ceiling
So I pray to God maybe he could forgive me
Then she was right there, right in front of me
Dancing in the moonlight, grinning at me
Rachel, regret herself, like something from a dream
But when she spoke, I knew that she was haunting me
I just want to feel
Something to fill the hole that I dug
When I lost you
And she was gone like a ghost
And I’m alone again
I’m alone again, I’m alone again
I feel at home with the rain
It helps when I carry my pain
It helps me cope with my fear of the dead
With my fear of the
——-
Iii. Belie
——-
He appeared in the corner, bringing entropy
Dragged from the depths of hell inside of me
I scream at him, “What the hell do you want from me?”
How can you become this mindless thing?
Gloom: “Have you forgotten so easily?
I am you. I am the madness that lurks within us all
Begging to be free at every moment
In your deepest animal mind
I am what you hide from in your beds every night
I am what you sedates into silence and paralysis
When you go to the nocturnal haven where I cannot tread
I’ll take over your mind and free you from thought
Put ropes around their necks and fear in their heart.”
That’s when he came and took over me
In my mind I hear him say “so nearly free”
And in my eyes
I saw hell
I saw hell
(Rachel):
I watch from the other side
Of the frozen glass
Tapping for his attention
Waiting for the gloom to pass
To tell him my story
But see the pain in his eyes
He saw heaven’s glory
I saw hell
I am the pain that you never saw
Bringing you down
I am a hollow shell
I am hell